Did you remember Valentine’s day yesterday?
I’m sorry if I brought up a sore subject and the person sitting next to you in elbowing you in the ribs!
Anyways, there are a couple of reasons why Saint Valentine, a third century martyr became the patron saint of lovers. First, because he was martyred when they caught him illegally marrying Roman soldiers to their betrothed before they went off to war; And second because medieval folks believed that this was the time of year when birds choose their mates. Either way, its was very good news for the florists!
But as a wise man once said, it is also sad that we need to be reminded to tell those whom we love that we love them. Not just for their sake but for ours as well..for the only way to true happiness is to love.
It’s like the friend of mine, whose wife said recently, “You never tell me that you love me.” “Of course I do,” he replied. “I told you 26 years ago, if anything changes I’ll let you know.”
Of course it’s a shame that so often we equate love with sex, in the same way that our consumer culture looks for instant gratification. But while sexual expression within marriage is a wonderful gift from God (which, after all, brought each one of us into being), it is not, in and of itself, love.
For the depth of love is found in the realization that “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast…it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs… rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.” It hangs in there.
Love is not instant gratification. Love is that intimacy that is born of a lifetime of sacrifice and caring, of mercy and patient endurance.
It is the kind of love which in every moment and throughout the years gradually transforms us into the image of what God made us to be, so that ever-so-slowly we come to look like the God who made us.
Think of the newly minted bride and groom, flush with the passionate flames of attraction and beauty. They are convinced that no one has ever know such love.
But then think of then forty years later, after they have come to know even each other’s weaknesses and even the darknesses that hide in every human heart. All those times they needed to forgive each other. All those times they needed hope in each other, even when things looked pretty hopeless. All those times when life disappointed them and they were afraid and cried.
These were the blessed moments when they were poor and hungry, weeping and insulted. But blessed they were, because because in spite of it all and because of it all they still loved like God!
One of my favorite blogs is called whenicometobeold.com and I will close with a recent and wise posting by its author:
“So watch your romantic comedies, drool over white brides and roses, fixate on Romeo and Juliet. But I know where the real romance is taking place, where “till death do us part” means something tangible, where “devoted” is a verb and not an adjective.”
